Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Such Sweetness in all the Goo





I'm coping with my crazy slinky sinuses as I write...on my 3rd round of homeopathy, as my symptoms came back...and have a stash of antibiotics from the doc singing seductively in my back pocket with a steroid nose inhaler quietly waiting in the wings. Working and thinking, even resting, are a challenging task, and I have no idea at this point what tomorrow or the next day will bring. Just doing my best one little effort at a time!


Although in this moment, I feel optimistic, I am very aware of the feeling of cement shoes on my feet and the compression in my head, as I attempt to get done the things that have to get done.

I'm wondering how my body will find a way to remove the cement shoes and bring lightness to my dear aching head . . .

I am amazed at the complexity of the tiniest of tiny, as my body's immune system rallies, like beacons of light and desire. The wild ones gather, knowing what to do without thought, without directions . . . they just listen, instinct alive, as they carry out their loving purpose and strive to find me new shoes to wear. My health is their desire, fulfilling my wishes, as the heaviness my human self feels at this moment, is making the simplest of daily tasks a monumental feat! 

Waiting for my dinner to reveal itself (it's in the oven), I stare at the floor and admire the Kleenex box my mother hand-painted that usually just sits quietly on display. Through all this, it has been given the great task of taking tender care of this weary body and wee tired soul, striving to find her way back to a clear head. A tenderness flows as I reach to my mother's hand-painted box for a kleenex.  And I see that, even with all this . . .  my heart opens and I smile as I remember her. 


Friday, September 24, 2010

I am Often Seeking





















I am often seeking... seeking health, seeking love, seeking relief from pain, seeking joy. I remember a poem by Rumi, and think, if only I could remember...

"If you are in search of the place of the soul, you are the soul.
If you are in search of a morsel of bread, you are the bread.
If you know this secret, then you know
that whatever you seek, you are that."

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Dear Wild Woman


Someone asked me the other day, how the Wild Woman Mystery Cards came into being? I wanted to share the story with you, so here it is.
There was a moment in this journey, when I didn’t know what had transpired was going to possibly be the impetus to create something more than a hobby I did when I was able to or something even more than I had ever imagined. Being an artist, writer and teacher, it was a natural thing to write, paint and learn as I traveled along my own healing journey. Following my heart, I created a set of 16 healing stones which grew into a set of 27 handmade cards, each with its own symbol and meaning written on the card. It was, in a way, documenting and learning from my human journey, which I affectionately called, Wild Woman.
The year my mother became very ill, I returned to my childhood home and took the card set with me. Through the days, we would often pick a card and read them together. In her final many days in the hospital, she had her Wild Woman Cards with her by her bedside. We would pick one from time to time and read it together and talk about whatever that meant for us. One day, after reading hers, she began to look at them all, and admiring my work out loud to me. As we sat there talking, she put the cards down getting my attention and looked at me intensely. "You have to do something with these Liz." she spoke "You really have to do something with these. You must publish them." She paused and looked at them again. "You are on to something" she said looking back at me. "I don’t know where you get this from but you have to do something with these." She was very determined.
The days were long at the hospital, and mom was moved often from room to room because of the busyness and bed juggling that happened as a result. I was cleaning up the mess accumulating in her hospital room after yet another move. I turned to her “I’m going to take your cards home because there are so many” I said, as I collected the many greeting cards she had received from family and friends. She lifted her head off the bed in panic as if trying to get up and said with urgency “No Liz, you can’t take them!” I turned in surprise. I looked at her and said, checking to see if I heard her correctly … “oh, okay. You want your greeting cards to stay here with you?” “Ohhhh” she said relieved relaxing back into her bed “No, you can take those. I thought you meant the Wild Woman Cards.” I looked at her. “You want the Wild Woman Cards to stay with you?” I asked puzzled. “Yes” she responded, her eyes smiling. “They bring people to me” I turned and looked at her. “What do you mean?” I asked. “When the nurses come in for their shifts or are on a break” she said “they find me and come and we pull a card together and we talk”. “Oh” I said surprised. I had no idea this was happening. I was overcome and in an odd way a relief waved over me to know that my mother was being cared for when I wasn’t’ there in ways I had never even imagined.
The whole thing became even more real to me one day when I met one of the nurses in the hallway on the way to care for my mother. "I love your cards" she said stopping me as I walked by. "I pick one everyday with your mother before my morning shift no matter what room she is in and it really helps me. It gets me started on a good foot for the day." As she shared her experience with me, my mother’s story grounded in a way I hadn’t expected. Many of the nurses were doing this, whether they were assigned to my mother or not. Something was going on with the cards in the hospital. They were healing us all, no matter what role we played or who we were
It has been some time now, since my mother passed away, but the spark from that time lives deeply in my heart. The cards over the next couple of years grew into more than 27 as I drew, painted, learned and wrote, and there was a point where I just felt strongly that I had to do something with them. In looking back, I realize that motivation may very well have been deeply ignited with my mother in those meaningful and soulful times by her bedside.
Now the cards are here, and I'm "doing something" with them, and more is beginning to happen... and I am shown once again, that what we do from our heart is always the right thing and always good for ourselves and those around us. Now, what began as healing stones, and then a deck of handmade cards is now a deck of Wild Woman Mystery Cards, a set of 53 cards, and 123 page book that explains the meaning of the cards in more depth... and an online store and other products are developing from the cards and naturally emerging. There are times, when I simply shake my head in disbelief... and then smile as I ground it in delight of what was seen back then and now here in the light of a new day. What a blessing... what a complete and beautiful blessing... and like a friend of mine says "You can’t beat a good blessing."
Yours in the wild