Saturday, October 18, 2014

Falling Face First in the Mud is the Messiest - And it's Where you Find this - That is if you are Brave


It is for those whose faces fall flat in the mud and pulled themselves out. Those people who say things like…. oh' just let it go', 'if it doesn't kill you it makes you stronger', or 'I just say to myself blah blah blah' blah'  ….    Tell these folks to take a hike.

For those of us who have tripped and had a hard time getting up again, with swollen ankles and scraped knees…. wounded hearts…  we know differently. We know we will rise again because we know the path, but we also know that we will be covered in the mud, face flat hardly breathing, driven into the kind of pain that rips you apart and takes the guts of your insides with it.

But we know, because we are still here, that we will rise up through the fire of hell on Earth. That there is something greater that helps us pull through....  But for those who live on the surface, in the grey zone, thinking they are happy and have it all figured out…. maybe they think they are doing it… but it's not true wisdom…They are the ones that  talk the talk but don't walk the walk….. Don't get confused by these people.

Wisdom is attained through being torn upside down and somehow coming right side up again. It comes from screaming and crying and holding on for dear life and letting go and falling down so fast and hard that you couldn't breathe when you hit the floor. Bam! With a gasp that barely finds air.

What I've learned has come from broken hearts, scraped knees, tornadoes of the soul and deflated spirit. It comes from falling down a hole so big I couldn't find my way to the stairs to get me up. It's come from not knowing a thing anymore because the floor was ripped away from my feet just when I needed it most. It comes from not knowing how to love again when my heart has been smashed beyond repair. And it comes from rising, when I didn't think I could. From being brave enough to find where it's safe again. From letting someone hold me in my most vulnerable places. From allowing my self to be seen, even if I felt as if I was going to die from it.

This is what guts are made of. Guts of the soul. Guts of life. Guts of bravery. Guts of a flaming heart. Guts of a Wild Woman.

And I wouldn't change it. I wouldn't change it because it made me who I am and what I love about where I've arrived and who I've become. I know that everyday I'm becoming … even more. It is a journey without destination.

But had someone told me some words of empty so-called wisdom... when my face was down in the mud, covered in dirt and missing a shoe I would have known they hadn't passed through the initiation into their own life. That they were living a fantasy from which they felt they should rise, not from where they actual rose. That their falseness had no place in my blatant reality.

You see, the thing is… you can feel it when a person says they know or when they have the ability to just be with you, and see you. Trust this knowing, even face down in the mud...or rather because you are face down in the mud.

I might think I want to be 'fixed' or to allow it to just pass by, but who would I be with out the dark night of the soul. It has brought me deep into the depths of my life, deep into the places that can only be reached when you trip on your path or find yourself, bum flat, heart burning, tears aching. It's then  the you that you are becoming finds her way onto her path like no one could ever tell you… and it's then that all that you need comes to you, because you are where you are suppose to be. How could I have ever written the Wild Woman Mystery Cards, without first being face down in the mud, covered by the earth, and buried in pain, traveling the trenches, seeking that which I needed to find and then pass it along?

How could I have loved my self now, had I not been real about what I was feeling?

I admit, I have been fortunate to have the best friends. Without them, I don't know if I would have made it through some of the rights of passage in my life…. but ultimately, I also know, it's what I needed to allow me to step into my destiny, with fervor and peace and excitement… cause I know, what it's like on the other side.

As one of my Shaman teachers said to me one day while working together "With that much pain, there is much joy on the other side." She said it just at the right moment. After tears that could fill the universe and anger that could rip out a heart. But I knew she knew. I could see it in the light in her eyes, in the conviction of her tone, in her wise timing with me, and the smile on her face. A compassion filled with hard won wisdom and knowing. It was real. Her words had teeth. Her wisdom reached inside. She knew.

Know this Wild Woman ... Be brave. Do what is right for you. Honor all those places and don't let even one person skim over it like it was the cream on the latte. It is not. It is hard and not to be skimmed over like it never happened and hidden like you can't say it. No. It is what it is. No lies. No fantasy. It's real.

Be brave. Let your self feel your reality and know it is where hard won wisdom is born.

Seek those who also have mud and guck on their faces from the depths of the journey and lived in the horror of some strange freak turn in their life. It's those people you want to be part of your tribe.

They are the ones that have the compass.

With love.... real, deep love.... 


~Elizabeth xo


About Elizabeth MacLeod
Founder of Wild Woman Enchanted
Creatrix of the Wild Woman Mystery Cards

Your wild is an endangered species. 


I'm here to help you free her
and anchor your capacity  ...

Visit my on-line portal at: 
Lots of free wild things there for you


Susie Mordoh said...

Your muddy, gutsy, authentic lesson is exactly what leads to wisdom. As I was reading your blog (with a big smile on my face) I kept thinking of your final sentence about 'having a compass'. Our shadows can make the light feel brighter. XO

Elizabeth said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Elizabeth said...

This light is brighter than we can even realize in my experience. And the interplay of light and dark, is certainly necessary for the light to be brighter. Amen Sister! Thanks Susie xo (oh btw...I deleted the comment above as I couldn't edit it and I had my fingers on the wrong keys for a bit so some the words were gobadly goop ! Oops!…kinda muddy! ;) … so here I am again!) xo

Maria Davis said...

Oh I so hear you, see you and love you Elizabeth MacLeod - beautifully written xx

Elizabeth said...

Thanks Maria xo

Elizabeth said...

Maria , we … Wild Women … know this well, don't we..

Sue Ann Gleason said...

Brave writing, indeed, my friend and so much truth in that. Having lived through (survived) more than one dark night of the soul I am forever grateful that I have the memory of 'climbing out' because THAT is what keeps me ever present to the journey. And it is a journey. Loved this line, especially: "Her words had teeth. Her wisdom reached inside. She knew." We know when we are in the presence of one who knows. Thank you.

Elizabeth said...

Namaste Sue Ann Gleason. Namaste

Hridaya Wellness said...

So true, so true, so true, I get it, I get it, I get it. The fall, the messiness, the allowance to be exactly as it is, the expansion, the light, the insights, truth, wisdom that grow from that light, and you Elizabeth a pioneer. I love the sweetness of the nectar that comes from the barbs of the down elevator, but oh so much pain. Thanks for the truth dear friend, so valuable:) xo

Elizabeth said...

You too are a pioneer, dear one. I love what you said when you wrote this …"I love the sweetness of the nectar that comes from the barbs of the down elevator, but oh so much pain." I felt you. ….Many blessings dear wild soul, many blessings xo

Cathy Sykora said...

Great post, very inspiring and I love your words. It is all necessary for the balance of things. We wouldn't know how to recognize or appreciate pleasure if we had never known pain. And the woman who said just the right thing to you at just the right moment, that is beautiful. The greatest gift that someone who has taken their fair share of being knocked down in life has to give, is their experience on how they overcame it. Reassurance in those times that it seems things will never change, that the storm will pass. Thank you for sharing this!

april said...

thank you, elizabeth. having just gone through a street robbery - where my personal space was invaded, my wrist left scarred, and an extremely sentimental item forever taken from me - i appreciate your words very much at this moment in time. i need to slog through the mud a bit before i "let it go." before i eventually move on and become stronger, as i know i will, as a result.